Exposing Core of Disciple's Heart

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Bengali/English lecture on Sri Vyasa Puja Day
29 September 2019, Tarakeswar, part 12

Many times people come to the temple, live there for a few days and then get scared, "If I stay in the temple, who will take care of me in my old age? There will not be anyone to give me medicine... They will tell me to sleep in the nat mandir..." Whatever unhappiness comes, you must not give up Krishna consciousness. If Gurudev chastises you or somebody treats you without respect, will you leave Krishna consciousness because of that? Srila Gurudev said, "I do not really chastise anybody because I do not get such people whom I would be able to chastise. There is only one person whom I can chastise, other than him there is nobody." Why? Because when Gurudev chastises, many will say, "Dandavat, I have already left many Gurus like you."

Srila Prabhupad used to say, "Everybody is my Guru, I have no disciples, that is why I cannot chastise anybody—if I chastise them, they will be offended." What must you do if somebody speaks bad to you or if somebody scolds you? You must say with folded palms, "Yes, Prabhu, I have understood everything by your mercy, and I have no other way. Where will I go? What will I do? I will only stay in the house of my Guru—no matter what austerity comes, I will never leave my Guru."

Some also say, "Gurudev, if I come to the temple, my wife, my sons will leave me." Gurudev replied, "Can I ask you one question? Your sons and wife can leave you, but can you leave them? Tell me the truth." These are Srila Prabhupad's words.

You know the story about it. There were two sadhus sitting on the bank of the Ganges in Haridwar. It was winter time, very cold. Suddenly, they saw some black thing floating down the river. One sadhu told the other one, "Listen, it is so cold at night, but here is a blanket going down the river. Let's take it home!" The other sadhu agreed and jumped into the Ganges to pull the blanket out. He grasped onto the blanket, but this 'blanket' was no blanket in fact—it was a bear! The bear had jumped into the river, but the current was so strong that he could not get out of it. So, when the sadhu grasp onto the bear, the bear also grasped onto him—it thought it was some log that he could catch and use to get out. So, now both the bear and the man started struggling to stay alive. Seeing that the sadhu was drowning, the sadhu who stayed on the bank shouted, "Leave the blanket! Leave it!" The sadhu said, "I have left the blanket all right, but the blanket is not leaving me!"

So, Prabhupad was saying, "You come to the Math, your wife and children will leave you, but can you leave them? Tell me the truth."

When you become crazy, when you become mad, you will not be able to remember any social rules and regulations, any proper etiquette or good manners. You leave home, you leave your old mother and father and come to the temple, but you worry what people will say. They will say, "He has left his old parents! Who will look after them? This boy is crazy, he is not a good man!" But when you become crazy, you will not care for any of these mundane, social things. They told this to me too. When I left home, they said, "A learned boy, he had a good job, he was earning much, but now he has become mad—he has left his job and gone to some temple." They said about Raghunath Das Goswami Prabhu,

chaitanya-chandrera krpa hanachhe inhare
chaitanya-chandrera 'batula' ke rakhite pare?"

"Lord Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu has fully bestowed His mercy on him. Who can keep home such a madman of Chaitanya-chandra?"

(Sri Chaitanya-charitamrita, Antya-lila, 6.41)

When you become crazy about Krishna, nobody will be able to keep you, not even if they bind your hands and legs! Raghunath Das Goswami Prabhu's parents had him married to a girl who was as beautiful as a goddess, but could they keep him with that? They could not. He still left and went to the lotus feet of Chaitanya Mahaprabhu.

So, what Srila Prabhupad is saying here is very beautiful. You leave your home and come to the Math—your family leaves you, but do you leave them? Do you not think of them from time to time? Many also come to the Math because of some problem at home. For example, somebody quarrels with his wife, leaves home and comes to the temple, but after some time he again starts thinking about his wife and goes back to his house. This happened recently also in one of the temples. A man had lost his phone (along with the thousand phone numbers that were written in it) and two months later he tells me, "Gurudev, can you give me some money? I need to buy a phone. I will just call them and speak to them, ask them how they are, then I can serve at the temple and will not have to return home." This is what Srila Prabhupad is saying here—your family leaves you, but can you leave them and not think about them?

You do not enter into a relationship with the Guru just by taking a mantra from him. If you have love and affection for your Guru, then you have some relationship with your Guru, then your journey up the ladder of devotion has begun. If such feeling that "Gurudev is my very own" does not arise in you, then your practice of Krishna consciousness has not yet begun. People think, "This is my mother," "This is my sister," "This is my father," but they never learn to think, "Hari Thakur (the Lord), Guru Thakur (Gurudev) are my very own." You say "jay" to your Guru and offer one flower, there is nothing wrong in that, but it is also necessary to know what the true relationship with the Guru is.

You offer Tulasi, you offer flowers to Gurudev but you cannot understand the loving relationship with the Guru (the relationship when you feel deep in your heart, "I love Gurudev, and he loves me") through the scriptures or by reading the song books. When such loving devotion arises in your heart, then you will very quickly progress in your service to your Guru.

Gurudev has two thousand disciples, but you must see that everything is all right in your temple, if everything is going on well in the service to your Deity—if you see that nobody has cooked, that the Deity is kept hungry, it will give you pain. Those who have love and affection will understand it is a sin and an offence. Yet there are people who will say, "My service is in the goshala. The person who cooks is sick today, but I do not need to go there. I only serve in the goshala." It is those who have some feeling, some affection that can do service—even if they may do something wrong, even if they may commit some sin, this does not last many days (they learn and correct themselves) because they have that affection and innermost relationship with their Guru (they feel, "My Guru is my very own")—their divine love will flood everything and wash away all impurities and faults. When this loving relation ("He is my very own") creates so much urge, so much power and capacity within a person, I tell them from the bottom of my heart [Srila Prabhupad says], "If such feeling comes to you, you have attained success." You must understand this. It can be an old man, it may be an old lady, it can be a little girl, it can be a small boy, they may not be able to sing, they may not be able to cook, they may have no external qualification, but if they have that much love for the Lord and the Guru, I offer millions of obeisances at their feet as they have attained the quality and qualification to serve their Guru.

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